Ages come with gifts from life, gift in form of wisdom, knowledge, experiences and lesions.
When I was younger I wanted to be older, I always feel I was missing a lot. There are things I wished to do then but I couldn’t do them.
But now, I have grown to an extent where I now mostly allow my conscience to determine my actions. I believe as an adult, our conscience determines what we do and become. Our conscience is like a compass that guides our interaction with life.
Life is vast, and there are many interpretations of what life is all about. When I was younger I had a perception about life and now as I grow older many things have changed. My philosophies, how I perceive things, has changed.
I’m 27, within these 27 years of a rollercoaster ride in life, life itself has thought me numerous lessons, there are thousands of lessons life has thought me, like walking, talking, running etc. But I want to share with you 5 profound once that has and will change my life and I hope they help change yours.
1. When you are 6, 12 or 18 years old you barely know what you are going to become when you are 27
I know there are people who often conceive a dream when they are younger and follow it through to accomplishment.
But that is often rare.
When I was younger I wanted to become a pilot.
My class teacher once asked: Emma what do you want to become when you grow? “A pilot” I replied. My classmates laughed.
I couldn’t comprehend why they laughed, l later got the message that my dreams were too big for a poor boy like me.
Years ago, I was arguing with my sick dad I was demanding what I felt was my right, the right to be trained in school by my parents. My dad shook his head in disappointment, and he had a wish, his wish was if he had all the money he would have sent me to a law school.
I didn’t know why he felt I will do well in law, maybe because I presented a strong argument to him.
After that comment by my dad, I wanted to become a lawyer.
Another time as I grow older, I wanted to be a Doctor. Then a businessman. Then a Marketer. Now there are many things I want to be, one of them is to become a better writer.
Life is a mysterious journey, no one has it all figured out. You can’t tell what will happen in the future, but as human, we have distinct abilities compares to other animals, we can determine how the future will look like. Fun or boring, good or bad, fulfilling or regretful.
If you are below 27 in age, here is my advice, I can’t advice you if you are above 28 or 30 or 40, because I don’t know what it feels like to be that age, but if you are below 27 my advice to you is this, the goal should not be to draw a line on what you are going to become in life, the goal should be to keep a positive attitude towards life and change for good with the changing world.
2. To be fulfilled in life you need to balance many areas of life.
The world around us makes it looks like money is all that matters. But I have come to realize that money is just one part of the overall components of a fulfilled life.
I’m not in anyway disrespecting the important roles money play in our life. One of my best quote about money is “money is the root of all good things” this opposed the popular verse in Bible that says “money is the root of all Evil” I believe the bible doesn’t lie, but I also believe that money being the root of all evil will greatly depend on who have the money and what the person uses the money for.
But money is not everything, money is just part of everything.
I believe a fulfilled life is a life where you are happy with who you are, what you are, what you have, what you are becoming and where you are going.
It might really take a while to reach this state and in life.
But you don’t need only money. I believe to find a fulfilled state in life we need what I chose to call ‘the 7 component of a fulfilled life” I think I should write a book about that this.
I personally created this list to give myself directions in my own journey
I believe to be fulfilled in life you need to balance…
Health: you need to shape your body, mind and soul, they are your greatest tool in this life.
Wealth: this is where money comes in, you need to be capable of giving yourself all the luxury you desire.
Freedom: you need to able to do your own thing without permission from bosses, boss
Love: you need a heart to complete and compliment your own heart
Relationship: you need to have good people around you, people who will support you, even when there is no reason to support you. Team, friends and family are best suited for this.
Happiness: happiness is an art, I believe to be happy you need to create your own happiness.
Spirituality: you need to have faith in something, it can be anything for you, but let love and kindness be a major part of it.
I wish I can elaborate more about these components here.
I believe to reach that state in life where you feel fulfilled you need to balance these areas of life. Take note, I didn’t say perfect them, I said balance. It simply means you must not be totally lacking in any of them.
The challenge is it might take time. But my greatest joy now is that I have a blueprint that I can work with, I don’t care how long it will take, I’m fully in for it, into creating the kind of life I want for myself.
3. Human are naturally selfish
I got to discover this not too long ago.
As human we are naturally selfish, in every relationship we engage in, we are always looking out for what we can get, take or be given.
What if in an intimate relationship, both parties frequently asked how can I help you become more or better, Instead of counting about what is not given and taken.
What if before we cash out of that deal we ask the other party if his or her interest is covered.
We don’t do that because we are naturally selfish, our goal in every relationship is to please ourselves.
You don’t have to feel bad about it, it’s a natural tendency so there’ s nothing to be worried about. All you can do now is take advantage of this discovery.
Knowing about this can help you position yourself to get whatever you want from everybody. I wish I could share how it has been working for me lately, but that will make this post longer. So I will leave it for some other day.
But here is the tip, everyone who has something you want need something from you. This is the strategy entrepreneurs use in this 21 centuries, nature uses it too, politicians use it, even prostitute uses it, but you can always use it positively.
4. Appreciate the unsubstituted act of failing In life.
We are all imperfect being. As human we are always evolving, we are always trying to be the best version of ourselves.
Most time in our life, this goal of us trying to become the best version of ourselves will involve us doing something we have never done before.
And when you do something you have never done before there’s no promise that you will get it right in the first attempt, so you may likely fail. Looking at it from this perceptive, I don’t see any shame in failing on something I have never done before.
Before now, the first thing I do when I fail on something is to find excuse. I use to whine about my past, how unfortunate I was and so forth.
Then, instead of taking responsibility, I will start the blame game.
Here’s how the blame game works, you sort through your life you find people whom you feel should have helped you one time or another in your life but didn’t move a finger, maybe due to their own struggle with life too. You sort these people out and hip all the excuses on their head for causing you to failure.
Me, it used to be my parent, then my brother, then my inlaw etc.
When you play the blame game, you don’t find time to evaluate why your actions failed, you don’t find time to examine when and where you bought the wrong plan for your actions that didn’t work.
And more importantly, you don’t ask the most important question you should ask when you hit an end post, questions like “what is in this for me”
Failure is as a result of doing something in a wrong way.
Failure is there to correct us, imagine you doing something wrong and there’s nothing there to point it to you that this isn’t the right way. Imagine wasting all your life doing something that doesn’t lead to you desire.
Life has thought me that the more you appreciate failure the more you grow in all ramifications.
5. Every of our past experience is preparing us for today and tomorrow.
I used to call myself a loser, because I have failed in so many things.
Business, relationship, formal education, etc.
I decided to discontinue formal education after 2 years of schooling and start self-education, people see the idea of starting a study and not finishing it as a failure, so to most people I failed.
But the lessons I have gained in these experiences will be valuable to me today or tomorrow, you can see I’m already writing about it, they will help me make sound decisions today or in the future.
One time or another in the past, we have made decisions that drastically changed the entire course of our life, those changes happened because of today or tomorrow.
Those changes are getting us ready for the big picture of our life. This becomes true if you choose to see it that way, rather than whine and complain about your disappointments in the past.
It feels good to be 27, living 27 on this planet is a lot to be grateful for. I thank God, the universe for being leading me this far.
I hope to share my experiences when I’m 28, but then I want the titled to be “how I used what I learnt at 27 to become a better person at 28.
But till then, wish me the best.